Now listening to: Andrew Bird's "Noble Beast"
Specially: Track 10, 'Anonanimal'
In my navy blue vans and my academic elbow pads, curling and uncurling in my local coffee shop, I am I think not far off from what I could have imagined for myself 15 years ago. I wouldn't have gotten the laptop right, or necessarily guessed the full contents of my ipod, but aside from technological developments (and the allergic reactions to home one develops if one stays away from home too long) this all seems quite predictable.
On my tabletop there are books, and I'm supposed to be writing things about them. That, more than anything else, was predictable. Wasn't it. But I'm not writing on literature -- at least not on literature 'as such', which is the closest I come to surprising this afternoon. I'm writing about religion, about the ways available for the mediation of grace.
I want to be able to work some comparisons among historical examples of heretical or schismatic movements. 'Heretical', as in opposed to some sort of orthodoxy. Only, it's the opposition that creates the division between the two, so how to examine the situation, the tension, without falling into category traps? Without accepting the names the winner gives, just because things need names. Parts do. I think I don't really get history. Chronology is such an assumption.
The other thing, thoroughly unsurprising to and of me, is that I cannot focus, and do not know how to write when i don't have something I want to write about. Falling back on nitpickicisms does not a presentation make. Also, just to state it for the record, i hate the spelling of the word 'surprise'. I think the first 'r' makes it ugly. Yeah, I'm not writing this paper right now. But someday it will be epic.